I have been so tired and exhausted this week. Not sure if it’s the heat or what? A couple of days I had to take 2 naps to get through the day. And felt like I had no energy at the gym, but tried to get through it anyways. Hopefully it will pass! The good thing is that I’ve been reading a lot. Reading ‘The Count of Monte Cristo’ now and it’s very exciting 🙂
On Monday after 2 naps, I felt like I needed to hit the outdoors for bit. Fresh air and nature is a great remedy for everything! Luckily I was the only cougar on the trail and didn’t encounter any rattlesnakes!
Working… As you see I have many talents such as a maid and a handy woman. Or maybe it’s a woman who could come handy?
Sometimes it gets hot so it’s perfect to sneak behind the house and cool off 😉
As I mentioned before, picket ball is my new hobby 🙂 Sometimes I play pretty good and sometimes I just smash it out in the bushes hahhaaa…
Tried to take some fancy pics, but this is how it really looks LMAO!
As I said, there’s been plenty of naps this week and Hunter is my constant nap-buddy!
But we start fresh every morning. Getting some sun rays, me with a coffee and Hunter looking for who knows what….
On Thursday I went to another ‘dinner with strangers’ with Ekam Supper Club. We went to a great restaurant called Urban Hill. I love beef tartare. As a kid I used to eat raw meatballs before my mom had time to put them in the pan hahahaa… And the lobster salad was amazing! Great people at our table and got great recommendations on hiking trails from a girl.
Also my friend’s dad goes to a coffee place early almost every morning here and it’s kind of a meet up with a lot of regulars. I joined him yesterday and it was great fun. Spotted this cool outside too as some people bring their cool cars to show off too…
Other than that it’s been some work at Alpha, my favorite coffee spot here, managed one gym selfie and pretended paparazzi at Whole Foods 🙂
Hopefully my energy is back next week! Also looking to go to Sweden and tonite there’s a BBQ & picket ball at the house. How you feeling about it being August already? Damn, time flies when you’re having fun 🙂 I also feel the need of doing some shrooms to re-calibrate myself and I crave dancing… I hope you are enjoying August and I’ll catch you next week if you are around 🙂
This week was awesome! On Monday my new friend here went with me to a surgeon to get a second opinion on my eyelids. Seems like a great surgeon, but need to save up some money because they’re expensive out here! The best part is that afterwards she took me to a market that sells European products. Mostly candy. I was in heaven and bought so much salty licorice candy that my stomach’s been in an uproar since then hahhaaaa…
On Tuesday I was up at 5am painting my face and then flew to Vegas. It was so much fun to catch up and shoot with Tyler Faith again. The photographer, Shelby, is also an old timer so we were shooting and laughing at old memories from back in the day!
On Wednesday I went to test drive another Audi and decided this is it. It feels a bit like a family wagon, but so comfortable to drive! And I have AC which the car I’ve been driving didn’t have. The feeling of being in car with no AC hahhaaa…
The funniest thing happened this week too. Well, maybe not for Hunter. We were outside in the morning, me drinking my coffee, when a deer shows up behind the main house. Hunter is checking it out and all is good. Until the deer gets startled and skips across the lawn into the trees. Hunter got so scared he ran inside and pissed himself behind the toilet. Sorry, it’s not funny that he got scared, but thinking that he lived in the Mexican woods and encountered all kinds of stuff, I just assumed a deer would be a piece of cake for him! No worries though, he has recovered from his trauma…
Been playing pickelball a lot. It’s so much fun and I even looked at YouTube videos on how to serve, rules etc. It’s a great alternative to regular cardio…
There is a great farm out here that you can buy all natural meat from and went there shopping yesterday.
In the afternoon I hiked and checked out Donut Falls. It’s a very easy hike, but then you have to climb up to see the ‘donut’ hole where the waterfall comes through into a cave. So cool and I was sitting alone in the cave for a while listening to the waterfall… Can you spot me up on the cliffs? And how cute are the little chipmunks or whatever they are?
Tomorrow I’m off to Vegas to shoot with another girl that has been in the business for a long time too. It’s going to be the best way to start the week since we have planned a fun shoot! Other than that I’ll see what the week brings me. Watching the 5th season of Fargo and it’s soooo good! Can really recommend it. Catch ya’ next week 🙂
This week’s focus was on cars. Went to the dealership because I wanted to test drive a Range Rover. People usually say to stay away from them, but I’ve had 3 of them before. I had some time and walked around the lot and saw an Audi and a Tesla. The Audi was a more fun to drive than the Tesla. Long story short, the Tesla was locked in Valet Mode so I couldn’t test the sports mode on it which might explain why it felt boring. I decided that I’m going to go with the Audi. Wanted to do part cash and part financing. Big problem when you haven’t lived in the country for years and have no permanent address, utility bills, etc to prove that you actually live somewhere. They are trying to work around the issue and I’ll find out tomorrow so cross your fingers 🙂
The Tesla did have one feature I did like…
I really enjoy the Xcel gym. I had to check my booty in the mirror if I actually made some gains. But it looked pretty worthless like always hahahaaa….
On Thursday I went for another dinner with strangers. Very fun people and one girl is hopefully connecting me with some photographers in the area. Another girl gave me a suggestion on a plastic surgery place that specializes on eyes so I setup an appointment for tomorrow 🙂
Threw in some work too…
I wanted to do an overnight hike this weekend, but didn’t have time to plan it 🙁 I did a great hike yesterday anyways. The nature here is amazing!
Last night we went for dinner & drinks. We all liked it so much I only managed to get a pic of one of the starters hahahaa… The table behind us was celebrating a birthday and the birthday cake was so cool that I sneakily took a pic of it… The place is called Urban Hill in downtown SLC if anyone is in the hood and hungry! We found a bar that has drag shows on one floor and a silent disco in the basement. I never tried silent disco, but I think I’d love it so will hopefully make it to this place another night 🙂
When I was outside grabbing a smoke I saw that the hills were on fire!
Hunter says hi to you all 🙂
I hope to sort the car out tomorrow. I’m borrowing a car now, but the AC doesn’t work and it gets a liiiiitle too hot here sometimes to not have it. I also found out that a friend from a long time ago is coming to Vegas next week. I hope to fly out and see her and shoot some content together 🙂 I also tried playing pickel ball for the first time this week and it was fun. Hopefully we play tonight! Eye consultation tomorrow and maybe another dinner with strangers… How about you?
I’ll leave you with this huge bug I found and me enjoying the morning sun. Wishing you a great upcoming week 🙂
Feels like I have most of my stuff in order now. Kind of…. Moved in to my own casita on the property and have my suitcases open trying to figure out where to put what. Honestly I’m just too lazy to deal with it all at once (boring).
Had friends in town from SF and one of them bought the Cyber Beast. WOW, such a cool car! For example, it can put on a light show which was pretty awesome. I would just blast that off randomly at a parking lot at night. My friend Ari got dressed up for the occasion I guess…
One night we went out eating and took the Beast. It records video around the car while it’s parked and it was funny to see people fixing their hair and checking themselves out in the car windows reflection… Great dinner by the way too 🙂
On the topic of dinners, my ‘dinner-with-strangers’ on Wednesday was also great. We were 2 tables with 6 people on each and were able to combine the tables together, so I met 12 new interesting people. If you get a chance to go to one of these, go! It’s so much fun! My next dinner with strangers is next week on Thursday 🙂
I scored Instagram to find a photographer here in Salt Lake City area and finally found one. We scheduled the shoot and he texted in the morning that he was on the way. 15 min later I get a text that he has been in a car accident. Luckily nothing serious, but we he had to cancel. Luckily I’m pretty capable and managed to scrape some content together on my own 🙂
There are a bunch of plastic surgery clinics here. I need to (or want to at least) do an eyelid surgery. One of them is pretty droopy and I went to see a surgeon here. Decided I want to hear what at least one more clinic has to say even though this surgeon seems skilled (and expensive lol).
Been doing pretty good at the gym even though it’s hard to drag your a*s there when it feels like 150 degrees outside!
My favorite moment this week was going hiking yesterday! It’s amazing how many trails there are to choose from just a short drive away! I went to Bell Canyon and it was a great trail. The higher up you went, the more shaded it got and was perfect to soak your hands and feet in the ice cold water on the way. When it says there’s a waterfall, there actually is a proper one! Done too many hikes and chased too many waterfalls to just find a semi dried up fall with just some water trickling down so this was amazing!
I was pretty exhausted when I got back and luckily Hunter was supportive of the suggestion of a nap 🙂
Hunter is loving his new grounds here. He stays close but likes to do small excursions…
For some reason the water I give him is not to his liking. He prefers to drink the sprinkler water off the ground or where ever he might find it lol…
Almost forgot about another amazing thing that happened this week. A long time friend of mine put me in contact with one of her friends here who I told you is also a psychonaut. Well earlier this week we met up and let this picture show you how awesome she is!
She had made me a little welcome present. She is super cool and and we shared a lot of psychedelic stories and I can’t wait to hang out with her again 🙂
Next week I’m going to look at cars. Was going today and halfway it hit me that maybe they are not open on Sundays. Yup, closed on Sundays so went to REI instead to look at camping stuff. I hope to go on an overnight hike next weekend.
Mostly been settling in here this past week. There’s a great gym Xcel Fitness that I joined. It’s two stories and has everything and more that you may or may not need in a gym 🙂
How was your 4th of July? Here it was a full house with BBQ and Indian food. I ate some spicy chicken and downed a quarter of a cheese and meat board so I woke up with cramps. That’s what you get when you can’t control yourself hahahhaaa…
I wake up early with Hunter and I enjoy sitting outside thinking about big things and contemplating life. The other morning this deer family walked by… Despite his name, Hunter, he didn’t make an attempt to go and catch dinner 😉
I finally got my hair fixed too. The worn out yellow-blonde with rat colored roots was in long need of some maintenance. I’m so happy with the results!
Taking some walks around the beautiful neighbourhood. I love passing the house with goats 🙂
Edited come content from my last shoot in Mexico…
Today we went to Park City for brunch and walking around….
And Hunter wants you to know he is also doing great 🙂
Next week I’m getting my own casita here. Visiting a plastic surgeon to maybe cut a bit on my droopy eyelids and meeting my friends from SF and a friend of a friend who also is a psychonaut 🙂 #matchmadebyshrooms. Also shooting, working out, and hopefully go on a hike in the mountains 🙂 And just signed up for a ‘dinner with strangers’ experience here in Salt Lake City – exciting!
And that’s a wrap for today 🙂 Wishing you a fabulous week coming up whether you’re working or on vacation!
Puh, finally got a bit settled in in Utah. Last days in Mexico consisted of packing, seeing friends, selling and giving away the last furniture and other things. Also stored 5 boxes at a friends house of stuff I wasn’t ready to part with. So much for clearing out hahhaaa…
Squeezed in some more Botox in face too…
Some last minute shooting that needed to be done. I painted this skirt which I think is awesome! Might be a tad much to wear in public though or what do you think?
Only had left over clothing to wear the last days so my outfits were very fashionable and coordinated! Should’ve just worn the penis skirt hahhaaa….
Hit the gym cause hauling boxes takes some strength.
Had a class of lighting and how to adjust focal points and depth of field with various techniques. I’m going to miss Leo’s classes!
Barbacoa lunch with Angel and his bf and amazing sushi & sake with Milla.
The last minute packing was no joke. I had planned to bring 4 suitcases, but the day before I realized I needed a fifth suitcase. Hunter was as always involved and supervising hahhaaaa…
Julieta who is Hunter’s extra mom when I travel came by and said bye too 🙂
The day before my departure someone picked up the bed and I camped out on the floor like the queen that I am 😉
I got to say that I was pretty nervous about flying with Hunter. I had created scenarios in my head where he escapes and runs around at the airport or in the plane. But I should’ve known better. He was nervous, but behaved so good 🙂
I had read that cats can overheat and you can cool them down with a wet cloth. I had a wet t-shirt and I put on him when he was panting. He also wore a calming collar.
On the plane he stayed in his bag and at the airport he came out and walked around and wondered what’s next…
It was a long day and I’m so happy all went well! Yesterday and today we explored the grounds of our new crib…
Waiting on a French Press from Amazon so been popping by Alpha Coffee for my caffeine. They got such good coffee and a great place to work at too…
Was going to hit the gym today, but the weather was perfect for some outdoor exercise. Went to this beautiful park and ran around bit and threw in some push ups and jump squats too.
That’s what I managed so far. Can’t wait to go hiking. Got a 4th of July party happening this week and friends from San Francisco visiting… How about you? Got some vacation coming up or already on it?
…coming up. My attempts to pack have been so-so. I have a few piles of likes, keeping, maybe keeping, give away… I realize that my ‘keeping’ pile has to be reduced by about 50%. Obviously these go into the definitely-going-to-Utah-pile…
Hunter is not much help in the decision making and we ended up taking a nap on the balcony 🙂
Visited Dr Jorge who injected my veins again. He got some cool gadgets and he let me look through his ‘headset’ where the skin pretty looks see-through.
Hunter also had an appointment with the vet for his last shots before flying 🙂
Hit the gym and trying to show my guns off…
Work, work, work….
Also prepped all week for my ‘going away’/Midsummer party that was this Friday. Great party, and the friends are one of the things I’ll miss the most here in Mexico…
The morning after feeling the aftermath of Mezcal shots and Carahillos hahahaaaa….
My favorite cafe here, Sonambulo, had their 3 year anniversary this weekend so I went by for coffee and chocolate cake 🙂
Last night was spent on the couch with a pizza and Hunter got his share of the ham on the pizza 🙂 Like could you say no to this face?
Now on a break from packing and had to evacuate the cafe because there was an earthquake alarm.
I pretty much sold all of the furniture. Got a lighting class this upcoming week and picking up Hunters paperwork for the flight too. Other than that it’s mostly packing and getting rid of the last stuff, hitting the gym, shooting, and hopefully next Sunday I will be writing to you from Utah 🙂
XXX Puma
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Another week and less things in the apartment. Feels really good to clean out and get a fresh start in a new place 🙂 I’ve done this 3 times before when leaving from Los Angeles to travel for a year, moving from San Francisco to Puerto Rico and then from PR to Mexico. I used to stress so much clearing things out, but I feel calm now and doing little by little… Ask the last week if I’m still as calm 😉
I met Valentina about 2 years ago here in Mexico. She is such a wise and cool chica and I missed her. She’s living in Australia now, but is back visiting here in Mexico. We went to one of my favorite restaurant here in the city, Maximo . The food is always great and the chocolate dessert we had might be one of the best desserts I’ve ever eaten! I just regret I had to share it!
Do you need your coffee too before work?
No caffeine, no work…
Hunter is totally oblivious to any work and mostly just interrupts it… The look ‘not impressed’ written all over his face in the last pic hahhaaaaa….
His travelbag arrived and I’m happy he fits in it. He is a big cat!
Went and got some more laser on my sunspots and got stabbed with Botox. Usually I don’t mind the Botox shots, but maybe cause I had the laser first, it hurt so bad. She gave me this vibrator thing to try distract me from the pain. Hint, it didn’t work!
Guess my favorite color?
What else ? Have 1 episode left of the Bridgerton series and almost done with the 2nd season of Suits. Started reading Count Of Monte Cristo and it seems really good. Ordered boxes and vacuum sealed bags for packing. Shooting tomorrow and having a go-away party on Friday 🙂
Usually I have more selfies, but I guess it was more Hunter this week for the left over pics. He has just started appreciating catnip and gets a bit fired up. That’s about the only time he gets fired up. The rest of the pics shows his most common state 🙂
Oh, and to the Daddies out there, Happy Fathers Day! To the rest, happy upcoming week 🙂
Last week flew by. My friend Dayana took of off for the whole summer, so we grabbed lunch to catch up and say bye for a while… Or ‘until next time’ that is…
Fancied myself up as best as I could and did my thing…
Then Mistress Rose came over and we had some more fun 🙂
And Hunter is on a training schedule now since we’ll be flying in the end of the month. Practising going outside in the stroller and made it halfway out in the harness. He’s airplane bag arrives this week too so I’ll have time to get him accustomed to it 🙂
He needs his rest after his training which apparently he finds tiring… He lives a hard life (not)!
Getting rid of all my furniture and junk I’ve collected here the past three years. It’s a lot. My reasoning often goes: ‘this could be good to save just in case’… Like 3 year old airline tickets. Think I could use them again? People came over on Friday and pretty much bought everything. Luckily I and Hunter still have one couch to sit and sleep on hahahaaa…
This weekend I had a little pop up store for Psychonaut Explorer jackets at my friends cafe Sonāmbulo here. Very popular and people rocked them 🙂
I have amazing fans. This guy came by the cafe and said he knows I like mushrooms. He grows them and gifted me this gummy shroomie 🙂
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with all the stuff I need to do before moving and the best thing is hitting the gym and exhaust myself!
This week I’m going to sort out more stuff and give away a lot, dinner with friends visiting Mexico, touch up of Botox, shooting and training. Leftover pics from the past week. Like coming home and finding Hunter holding on to a pair of panties 🙂
So the big journey took place on Friday. I journaled before and really tried to set and clarify my intentions. Something that I questioned is what should I focus on? Is it photography or something else? I also wrote and said that I have fear, but I don’t know about what… I talked to Stacey, our facilitator, about how in my recent journeys with psychedelics I have felt fear/anxiety going into my trips. Fear of going to dark places. Nothing has been revealed when I’ve been in the ‘darkness’, mostly just feeling unease.
Mushrooms being measured in to individual doses by Troy and Jamie…
At 6.34pm I ate 5,5 grams of dried mushrooms and drank mushroom tea that was about 2 grams. Stacey suggested 7 gr when we talked, but my fear kicked in and we agreed on 5 gr. When I realized that I would be taking 7 gr after all, I decided to go with it. I felt pretty calm. In my mind I was saying I wanted it to be a good trip. Beautiful visuals and just feeling good.
It kicked in really fast for me (it always does) and I laid down and closed my eyes. The first thought I remember coming to me when I felt the effect was – promise yourself to never do psychedelics ever again, but then I started to have beautiful visuals and I was like, oh yes, this is going to be a great trip! Why would I not want to trip ever again in my life? I had 2 miniature guys that kept talking to me and I started asking them questions on what I should focus on. Is it photography? Will something else come up? They kind of just laughed and said that I can do whatever I want. I think we were in Vegas. Then I saw and visited a very light place, like a cave that felt like peace.
Then it was like the mushrooms decided that hey, let’s stop bullshitting around and deal with the real issue – your fear. I have always said “mushrooms don’t give you what you want, they give you what you need…” But I never experienced that, until now! I don’t exactly remember what I saw visually, I think it was mostly feeling fear, anxiousness and it being dark. I started to move and tried to get comfortable in my body. At one point I came to and my face was covered in tears without me realizing I’ve been crying. I think the mushrooms let me take a breather and then took me back in. At one point I came to and I was covered in sweat. I thought about calling for Stacey or Jamie to check on me. But I decided to just keep laying down and went back in.
At one point I was going in circles in my mind. I came back to the first thought, made conclusions and then I was back again. It was scary and I remember thinking I might never come out of this. Is this forever? I know from previous journeys that there are no other options than surrendering and pushing through. They played very calm music, and at times the music was quiet, making time stretch, and there were just my thoughts. I kept thinking, please put the music back on. I knew it was just a short break between songs, but it felt like the quietness lasted forever. Very hard to handle. I tried to guess how much time had passed and had to accept that I still probably had a lot of time left.
I think I finally started to come back and Stacey had in her notes that it was around 10.30pm. I needed to go to the bathroom and I was walked to one by Jamie. The floor was morphing so much. Going to the bathroom took me out of it a bit and I decided to put my headphones on and listen to my own music. I got up and started to move and dance a little. I remember thinking I was so fucking happy I was out of it and alive! I had a feeling that I went through hell and made it through. Felt relief and a feeling that I can make it through anything! Cyril was the only one left out on the chairs. I then started to dance more and then rocked out. I sat down at times and thought about my mom. First I wanted to brush it off, but decided to really take that in, sit with it and concentrate on my mom. The pain and hardships she went through. I realized I caused her a lot of worry. I cried.
In the end I sat by the pool just thinking about my experience and what I went through… All of a sudden I noticed this little bug crawling around me. Then there was more and it felt like they were all coming towards me. Not scary, just feeling that maybe I was connected to everything.
I think I went into my room around 12.30 am. Then Cyril came knocking and we went sitting outside and we talked about our experiences. He went through a big trip as well.
At 2 am I decided it was time for bed. I saw a lot of creatures when I closed my eyes, but I fell asleep fast and slept the whole night through…
So what do I feel now? I am more present and feel that I don’t need to know exactly where I’m headed or what’s next for me. It will be revealed if I have patience and stay open. I had a knot in my stomach before and Mama Orah said that our feelings a lot of times express themselves in our stomachs. I don’t have that anymore. I don’t feel fear or anxiety anymore. I will definitely keep doing psychedelics and appreciate the trip I went through even though it was a hard one. I think I have one more big trip ahead of me that is about forgiving someone. But who knows, maybe the mushrooms will take me elsewhere…
Also made a decision when returning home to move. I’m moving to Utah. I’ll save that for the next post, but I’m very excited about it!!!
