I thought I’d share my notes and thoughts from yesterday’s trip. I took a medium dosage of mushrooms with three friends. I also had some Rapé before because I like the clarity and calmness from it…
2pm Took 75% of a ‘purple owl’ chocolate mushroom that was 1.5 grams of mushrooms but it was mixed with a MAO inhibitor. Here we go…
2.23pm I read some Osho – ‘Last in the Evening’, before eating the chocolate and I went outside smoking and decided this trip was going to be to celebrate me. Kind of like Osho says, celebrate everything. My body and mind is just a shell…
4.30pm Pretty high. Beautiful to let go. Eating some chips now.
5.16pm A lot of thoughts, here they come…
- Would everything be better without humans?
- Do I need to change?
- Is it enough to be aware?
- What good can I do?
- Where do you draw the line between accepting yourself as you are? What if you have depression, anxiety or something else…
5.30pm I feel exhausted…
Lied back down and let my mind drift. The question “what is the most beautiful thing in the world?” came to mind… Kept thinking about it and two things came to me – nature and freedom… I asked my friends and one of them said kindness. Another one said curiosity and wonder. The third one was processing his own trip so don’t have his input…
Around 7.30pm we all felt that the trip had ended and talked about it. Went eating and back home. Read some more OSHO before falling asleep.
A lot of people talk about integration after having a trip. What you do or how to process what you experienced during your altered state. Sometimes I don’t have so many thoughts after a trip; it can be just a recreational experience that I enjoy. But last night and today I’ve been thinking a lot about the images and thoughts that came to me during the trip. I think it has to do with reading the OSHO book.
I was thinking about what is the most important thing that I took with me from my trip. I think it’s the word compassion. In a way it was one of the most beautiful trips I’ve had. Very beautiful images, thoughts, and feelings. Sometimes I feel it’s not fair that I’m feeling so good considering how many people are suffering. During my trip, I was thinking of people in war for example. I don’t know how it would work, but I tried to say in my mind that I could take on their pain/suffering/fear for a while since I was feeling so good. Let them feel what I’m feeling, I would take on what they are feeling, and give them a break for a bit. Or that somehow we could connect and I could share what I’m feeling and my head-space.
Usually on my trips I always come to the conclusion that I have to spend more time in nature. On my walk this morning I thought about prioritizing to plan a trip to hike in Patagonia next year. But then thinking about what Osho says in the book, you don’t have to climb Everest or fly to the moon to find happiness, you need to work on your inner self right where you are. So should I just be content where I am, or should I plan a trip?
I always love these experiences as they give a lot of insight and I feel I become more aware. I will keep pondering on my questions and see what else arises.
Please share if you have any memories or stories from experiencing psychedelics 🙂
XXX Puma