Death, pretty much the only certain thing we get in life. And still so many people are uncomfortable talking about it. I’ve pretty much come to terms with death a few years ago. This happened during a psychedelic experience. During the ‘trip’ I just came to accept that I’m going to die and I don’t have any fear of it. Of course I don’t want to die yet 🙂 And I’m sure if a plane is crashing when I’m in it, I’d be poo-ing my pants!
I have clearly told a couple of people closest to me what I would wish for in certain situations. Like what if I go into a coma? I have been very clear that I don’t want to be kept alive if a machine handles my breathing and all I’m doing is being bedridden. If I’m in a coma for 6 months, it’s OK to say bye to me. And I want to be cremated and I don’t really care what happens with the ashes. Do what’s convenient…
Probably like 20 years ago one of my friend’s mom died of cancer. She said they had never talked about funeral arrangements. It’s not something you want to bring up when you know someone is facing death. She said she wishes they’d talked about it so she and the rest of the family would’ve known if there was something special her mom wished for. Burial in a coffin, cremation, prayers, songs etc… I remember she told me after to talk to my family about these things now. Not to wait. So we all did. My mom passed almost 2 years ago and it felt good to know exactly what she wanted for her after death.
I’m also reading a very interesting book now that was recommended to me – ‘Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End by Atul Gawande’. This is what Wikipedia says about it –
“a 2014 non-fiction book by American surgeon Atul Gawande. The book addresses end-of-life care, hospice care, and also contains Gawande’s reflections and personal stories. He suggests that medical care should focus on well-being rather than survival.”
I haven’t finished the book yet, but I really like it, and even though I haven’t finished it, I’m pretty sure I’ll recommend it when finished.
Another great book I can recommend when talking about death is – ‘Tuesdays With Morrie: An old man, a young man, and life’s greatest lesson by Mitch Albom’. It’s a very famous book and you can easily Google it. But one thing that I read in the book that really affected me was when the main character, Morrie, has a living funeral. As in having a funeral when you are still alive. It made so much sense to me. Like what’s the point of people (hopefully) praising you when you already are dead? And bringing big flower arrangements that you won’t even see? So in the book it’s basically a funeral were people tell Morrie all the stuff they would be telling at his funeral when he’s already dead. Ever since reading it I’ve been thinking about having a ‘living funeral’, but haven’t got to it yet.
My friend in Sweden just wrote me on WhatsApp and asked me what I was up to. Told her I was writing about death. She then recommended me to watch this clip on YouTube about a young Swedish woman named Elin fighting cancer. The clip starts by Elin saying she should be dead by now… It’s 13min long clip from her TED talk and really makes you think about how you are living your life. I highly recommend watching it and it’s in English.
OK, enough talk about death 🙂 I hope you are healthy and kicking ass out there!
Kisses, Puma
